Oh here I go again, I just can’t help myself, dashing your hopes, desires, and dreams – somebody slap me! Are you hoping 2013 will be better, perhaps more fruitful financially, less stress and anxiety, better relationships, more family peace, or maybe getting that bonus you’ve been waiting for? Oh boy, our endless wait before contentment and happiness land. But, if we’re not happy now, we won’t be happy when we do get those things, so you better figure out why you’re not happy now.
Why do you need those things before being content? How about accepting and being fine with their non-presence in your life, and proceeding from there. Find a way to live within the money you make, appreciate your family dynamic (as the family next door is even more screwed up), accept your situation in life, and allow the anxiety to peter out without fretting.
We are humans with emotions, impulses, passions, and cravings that pass through us. Those temporary sensations are not us, they come and go, their length of stay based on how much we indulge them or not. They can’t hurt or destroy you, unless you agree to hand the power over to them. To be happy and live in the moment, we don’t need to either escape them, or indulge them, but rather notice and manage them. There is nothing that takes us further away from ourselves and the true nature of our lives than our escapism, pandering to our incessant wanting and craving. Whenever I find I want more pleasure in life, it is a sad slide into blind unhappiness; for indulgence numbs me out, making me disgusted with self, and stunting my creativity. As Socrates said, “From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate.” When we desire to control situations, escalate our own gratification, or bend the world to our whims, we become very small and unhappy.
Choose differently this year. There are many choices and decisions that we have to make all on our own in this lonesome world, and there is nothing as lonely as the decision a person makes to be happy. It is never made when a great windfall of abundance is upon them, but rather is a decision that goes unnoticed in their darker recesses of living. It is probably the most important decision a person ever makes in their life, as it affects all of their other behaviors and interactions with others.
So are you playing the lottery with your life and hoping for dumb luck, or are you making a conscious decision to live your life with the outlook you so choose? Start using 2013 to invest in self, creating security within, so that no matter your external situation, you will be fine. Regardless of the conditions of your life, start appreciating being alive, noticing life around you, and nurturing your own intricate, beautiful tapestry. Don’t engage in wishful thinking, or how you aren’t getting your fair share in life. Forget the pity party, how others seemingly have it easier, and how life owes you; it doesn’t work that way.
Happy New Year to you, as you gird yourself in anticipation of anxiety, temptation, anger, cravings, and impatience to show up in 2013. Know that they are ultimately powerless over you, and be silent and still within long enough to sense that they are not you, but are just squatting temporarily in your psyche, waiting for directions to be given them to either stay or go. When you understand that those are temporary emotions passing through that serve no useful purpose, and have nothing to do with who you are, they will begin to dwindle away.
Give up the pipe dreams of things being different, grander, nicer, and easier in 2013. Sure it may be a better year for you, but that will be because of a decision you make, not because of any circumstances or events. It will be dictated by how you react to hardship, burdens, despair, and anger. Will you be ready and react with reason, resolve, and love for self? Or will you react rashly, irresponsibly, and disrespectfully to life? The decision precedes the situation, for it is too late when the vulnerable time comes, as there will always be excuses and justifications to give in to the current emotion, or into inaction. Let’s be ready for difficulty this great new year, for things not to go how we want or expect, and for frustrating, burdensome circumstances to try and drag us down; but onward we will proudly march!